(Insert Witty Title Here)

“When Beethoven passed away, he was buried in a churchyard. A couple days later, the town drunk was walking through the cemetery and heard some strange noise coming from the area where Beethoven was buried. Terrified, the drunk ran and got the priest to come and listen to it. The priest bent close to the grave and heard some faint, unrecognizable music coming from the grave. Frightened, the priest ran and got the town magistrate. When the magistrate arrived, he bent his ear to the grave, listened for a moment, and said, “Ah, yes, that’s Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony, being played backwards.” He listened a while longer, and said, “There’s the Eighth Symphony, and it’s backwards, too. Most puzzling.” So the magistrate kept listening; “There’s the Seventh… the Sixth… the Fifth…” Suddenly the realization of what was happening dawned on the magistrate; he stood up and announced to the crowd that had gathered in the cemetery, “My fellow citizens, there’s nothing to worry about. It’s just Beethoven decomposing.”

theparadoxymoron:

eelster:

sodamnrelatable:

oh my gosh

BEST JOKE.

THIS JOKE SHALL BE TOLD FOREVER

😂😂😂😂😂

SERIOUSLY so many beethoven jokes on my dash recently

(Source: caplan, via scarlarouge)

honksy:

*on my deathbed*

nurse: do you have any last words

me: i………..regret……being so……m…..mean………and heartless…………….

*the light goes out of my eyes*

*a small piece of paper falls out of my hand*

*the paper says one word only*

“sike”

(via stupidliferuiners)

egbuns:

otterthulhu:

rabioheab:

Cool Names For You To Name Your Children

1. Farquaad
2. Farquaad II
3. Farquaad III
4. Farquaad IV
5. Farquaad V 

You could call them the farsquaad

i literally just laughed so hard i cried over this text post my dogs are scared they dont know whats sgoing on

(via bimbofaggins)

gabilliamqueen:

i mean dating a band member would be pretty hard because they’d be on tour and stuff but i think it would be worth it because you could just go on tumblr and scroll through their tag and just smirk to yourself while thinking

haha

guess whos gettin that dick

not u

me

(via bonniejeremystefan)

sunshineface0014:

assbutt-in-the-garrison:

I need my glasses to find my glasses do you see my problem

You can’t even see your problem

(via unsuccessfulmetalbenders)

cornerof5thandvermouth:

if you stand in front of a mirror at midnight and say “idjits” three times bobby singer shows up and smacks you upside the back of the head for fooling with ghosts

(via mymindismysolace)